I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
