last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
