Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
i dont even know how to be here
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
