O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
