How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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