Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
What a dumb baby whore.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
