wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
