Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I could fuck to npr.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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