I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
