Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize