Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
