Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
