you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
