what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I could make wine with my vomit
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
