I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize
