you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
