I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize