we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
it's like iHOP with fire
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
