That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
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