i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Randomize
