you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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