I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
Randomize
