One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
