Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
