dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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