You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
