I'm lost and stupid without you.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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