ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
