Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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