Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
This house was built for laser tag.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
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