Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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