In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
