he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
