I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
