i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Randomize
