I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
