I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
