i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
