So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
