Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
