I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
