you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
