So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
