singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
