I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
