We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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