Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just gift wrapped bread.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Randomize
