And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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