Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I had to cum in my sink.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
