They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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