My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
